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Monday, January 23, 2012


Tarikh: 24/01/2012
Tempat: My own world
Mood: oh nooo..


Hi!! last day holiday.. tomorrow have to go back to work..erghh! ok2 have u ever heard about Paranoid?? confirm la biasa kan.. Today i wanna share my experience as a paranoid person.. I used to be a paranoid. and extreme paranoid person.. Then i were just thought that this is normal. because when u feel in danger than u'll feel something.. isnt it something normal?? yeah but not when it too excessive..

Still dont get it.. check this  out.. taken from one's website:

Diagnostic Features:

Paranoid Personality Disorder is a condition characterized by excessive distrust and suspiciousness of others. This disorder is only diagnosed when these behaviors become persistent and very disabling or distressing. This disorder should not be diagnosed if the distrust and suspiciousness occurs exclusively during the course of Schizophrenia, a Mood Disorder With Psychotic Features, or another Psychotic Disorder or if it is due to the direct physiological effects of a neurological (e.g., temporal lobe epilepsy) or other general medical condition.


Individuals with this disorder are generally difficult to get along with and often have problems with close relationships because of their excessive suspiciousness and hostility. Their combative and suspicious nature may elicit a hostile response in others, which then serves to confirm their original expectations. Individuals with this disorder have a need to have a high degree of control over those around them. They are often rigid, critical of others, and unable to collaborate, although they have great difficulty accepting criticism themselves. They often become involved in legal disputes. They may exhibit thinly hidden, unrealistic grandiose fantasies, are often attuned to issues of power and rank, and tend to develop negative stereotypes of others, particularly those from population groups distinct from their own. More severely affected individuals with this disorder may be perceived by others as fanatics and form tightly knit cults or groups with others who share their paranoid beliefs.

Seriously i were too paranoid during my school time.. I wont take a bus if there's no other man in that bus.. because at that time "kes-pemandu-bas-merogol" is increase.. It's ok at first time to let the bus go. but not or the second time.. and because of this paranoid.. i'd just let 2 bus go and wait for the third bus..  see how terrible i am.. then when other passenger out.. and i be the one with the driver bus.. i'll feel damnly anxiety until i arrived home.. Luckily i managed to overcome this feeling as i grow up older.. otherwise i'll waste my time waiting for the bus hehe

Second case is when i'm alone and there a man or women who act abnormally... then i'll simply2 cop him/her as orang gila..haha suka2 hati ja kan.. then i'll feel anxiety until that person gone.. it's not good right o think bad to others but i just cant avoid it.. Third case is something normal to other but excessive to me.. If my family or friend said that they'll be here or there in couple of hour.. if they dont appear or dont arrive home yet.. i'll feel anxiety and all the negative things will linger in my mind.. "Pasaipa depa lambat ni?"
" eh, entah2 excident apa", " awat lambat ni?"
Then i started to imagine all the unwanted things. and this feelings is haunting me till now..

It's good to take care of others but it will terrible your surroundings to.. because it will effect your mood your feeling.. and make other feel terrible to you.. I make an example.. especially when it came to Si Dia.. As usual he'll texted me when he want to go out or arrive at somewhere.. So when it come to the moment he supposedly arrive and he dont text me.. i'll think badly.. Then i'll text him and call him continuously .. if he didnt pickup my anxiety will be more terrible.. It's shows how you love someone but when it come to this it just too much. U disturbing other and make other feel exhausted... let say Si Dia should arrived there in 1 hour.. if he dont give response for 1 hour and 5 minutes i'll be gelabah-bewak.. see how terrible this paranoid..

What should we do is.. must think positively..otherwise it'll terrible you.. my friend had this problem too.. more terrible than i am.. He will wake up at night and checked his house's door and window for several time.. then he cant go out to shopping compleks alone.. he said that he has to seek for medical treatment and even seek psychologist.. haa jangan main2 bukan semua orang yang jumpa tu gila.. So he had to take medicine... but the effect of the medicine if you continuously take it.. it'll make u become addicted.. so he stop take it and change the way he think and finally manage to overcome it..

so if you have this symptom.. please change the way you think.. When it come to love.. you feel no trust to your love... u'll suspect him/her that may end up to fighting and broke up.. whatever happen.. remember everything is under control..

p/s: think positive...think positive.. 

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